Ashamed

That's the best word to describe how I've been feeling as I've been typing up the journal I used when I was 14-15 years old. Here are the top 3 reasons why I'm ashamed:

1. I wrote the word "tommorrow" incorrectly about a million times.

2. I complained A LOT

3. This entry:

"Later on we went to a church dance.  I had a pretty good time.  Hardly anyone I know was there but we made the most of what we had.  ______ asked me to dance w/ him.  What a surprise.  He’s asked me at every dance.  I wouldn’t mind it so much if he didn’t scare me.  There is this other guy that is stalking me.  He goes to summer school.  I hope I don’t see him there.  He asked me to dance with him at the last dance too.  Why can’t any hot guys ever stalk me?"



P.S. I did end up seeing that guy at summer school ALL the time. Only a few years later, I decided that both of the young men mentioned weren't so bad after all.

Practical

I am a pretty practical person.  So, I was pleased to see the practicality of one of my students today.

My class was solving a math problem that went something like this:

Jane bought 9 pieces of candy.  Each piece of candy costs 10 cents.  How much did Jane spend?

This student wrote 90 cents at first, but then changed it to one dollar.  

Why?

Sales tax.

Talk about students who are prepared for the real world. 

Take that Common Core Standards!

And now for some intriguing inventions I came across while searching for impractical things:

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There are 2 types of people in this world...

...those who like Neil Diamond. And those who don't.

This weekend, I discovered that I'm a part of the latter group.

I also discovered that hosting a "What About Bob?" party can be a lot of fun.

As the guests arrived, a Neil Diamond CD from the library was playing.

I had to turn the volume down really low so as not to go insane.

 My new pet, Gil, was excited to see his namesake on the screen,

 so we started the movie.  

I love "What About Bob" more and more every time I see it.

There is almost always something new to find humor in.

One of my very wise guests pointed out that

Dr. Marvin's children are named after Sigmund Freud and his daughter Anna.

Bob loves that Fay's corn is hand-shucked.

After the movie ended, we had a corn shucking contest.

It was intense.

 And the winner of the Salt Substitute is...

Jen with 10.5 seconds!

Unfortunately, Dr. Marvin didn't show up for a book signing,

but we did enjoy reading the cover of Baby Steps.

If you ever need "a vacation from your problems,"

let me know and I'll gladly watch Bob with you too. 

My Special Present

As I went outside to greet my amazing, little students the other morning, one girl told me that she had a special present for me. 

Once we were inside, she opened her hand to reveal...

a breath saver!

How did she know that I was really hoping for an unwrapped mint that

had been held by 8-year-old hands?

Owl of the Week

To introduce how we do student of the week in my classroom, I was the first "Owl of the Week."  On Friday, we always write letters to that person.  Here are a few highlights from the letters I received:

"I hope you are haveing a grate time whith Hedwig...So how whod you feel if I got you a real live owl.  It would be cool.  No-Yes

"I like how some times you get out of your mind!"

"You are so nice to us in class. I hope you stay alive for ever."

"owls are nauternal (nocturnal) that means they hunt at night. I like nauternal animals they can catch pray wile they are sleeping they don't even know."

So there you have it.  They don't want me to die and nocturnal animals can catch prey while they are sleeping.  Who knew?

Single

In my dream last night, I was called up to the front office of the school to redo some paperwork that I had filled out incorrectly the first time.  One of the questions was about my marital status.   After marking "Single," the principal's secretary started hounding me.  She told me that I better stop slacking and start dating more often.  It was rather comical when I woke up.  I told her about my dream this morning and she promised to never bug me about my dating life. I'm glad that people are nicer to me in person than they are while I'm sleeping.

I feel like a lot of my recent posts have centered on the fact that I am man-less and childless.  I promise that I am really not as concerned/obsessed with these two facts as it may appear.

Map of my Heart

Ever wondered what my heart looks like? 

Well, I've mapped it out for you:  

I created this as an example for my students at school. 

I was going to add color, but I got lazy.

They're going to refer back to their own heart maps when they are stuck on what to write about.

As you may have noticed, the top left corner of my heart is currently vacant.

If you have any suggestions of any kind, I'd love to fill it.  Especially if your suggestion involves a man. :)